A recent study found that children actually find the news way more terrifying than anything they’d see on a tv drama with blood and guts – and isn’t that the truth for adults, too? It’s much easier to explain acting and the idea of something being fake in a movie or tv show than it is to explain the cruel reality of the real world.
All within the last week, we’ve had the Ashley Madison scandal, the Subway guy turned out to be a pedophile and we’re still hearing new Cosby accusations – not to mention the every day shootings, robberies, overdoses, etc. Could the news be any more depressing?
Don’t you agree that it’s much easier to deal with sad or disturbing news when you can crack a joke and laugh about it instead of letting it get to you? That works for me and can be a good coping mechanism for adults, but what about our kids?
I’m really curious if my fellow mamas out there let their kids watch the news and how you handle explaining it to them. As much as I wish I could hide Evan from all of the negative and scary things going on out there, I know it’s impossible. As he’s getting older and picking up on more things around him, I need to be prepared with how I’m going to explain the disturbing news stories to him.
If a network created “happy news,” would you watch?
I do not hide. I never have. I use it to make discussions with them. Yes ugly as it is, but it’s a great way to know your children’s fears. This way we can show them the positives.
I don’t hide the news from my kids. If they happen to see my husband watch it or heard from other people talking, we explain it to them.. Unfortunely we lived in a world more crazier then we did growing up, but we had crazy stuff in the world back then to. I just feel that I want to not to keep my kids on a bubble. I do want not only be book smart but street smart too.. I want them to know what to look for in a good or bad person , got with there gutt and insteces and know how to react/ or be in a situation to a person who is nuts and wants to hurt people. Or just simply not get taken advantage of on this world … To stand tall and be brave and know what to do with out mommy or daddy being there to help them.. Maria .. Staten Island NY
I wish I knew- hoping for some good replies here My kids are adults but I worry for my grandchildren
It’s hard to explain to kids these days they hear stuff from their friend s see it on tv heck my kids ask questions I don’t know the answer to its sad:(
I have the last of two of five children left at home. We had special traditions one was to eat dinner together at the table every night with no electronic devices . This included a stereo or TV. We talk about the days events and things that are going on but we do not watch the TV as a family. Especially now that we have moved to LA from a small town in Oregon, where news there was a goat got out and the sheriff was able to return him home safe and sound. Current events are always good to be kept up to date on, they even do that in social studies, however it can be very frightening for children.
The “happy news” is out there if you seek it out, though maybe not on your broadcast 5pm news. I’d sure rather they put in a happy news piece or two rather than pointless “on scene coverage” outside of a building where something happened 10 hours earlier and it is now dark and nobody is there just to use up time, though.
I would watch every day with my family. I have been waiting for a positive news channel. It would be like the “Law of Attraction”. Positive attracts positive, and maybe we would see an improvement in our culture.
~Stacy
Hi Jenny!
I’m glad you started this conversation. I used to watch the news and non-G rated television before I had my son, but I made a conscious decision to eliminate it from our daily life when he came along. Of course, I still stayed up to date with online news and checked the weather–we do live in New England!
I took it a couple of steps further by turning off the radio while driving and unplugging from the “faux news” that I used to think was important.
And, you know what, it was such a great decision. Most news doesn’t really concern us and the focus is back on my family where it should be.
I know you are a celebrity and couldn’t take such extreme changes, but I think it is marvelous that you are thinking about how the outside world effects our family dynamic. Kudos to you!
Shielding your child from the realities of what takes place in the world causes more harm than good. They need to be prepared for what might await them as they go out into the world with all walks of life.
Sadly I’m becoming more and more convinced that my friends who say many of the scenes we see on the news are hollywood-like mockups intended to have a trauma based mind control effect on the masses. Add to it the psychotropic microwave signals from the GWEN towers to enhance the effect and you have the perfect sort of panic causing mechanism needed for a government to go bat shit crazy on security like it did on 9/11 passing legislation even the supposed authors didn’t understand.
Keep up the Autism fight Jenny!
You have a special corner of my heart always there for you!
Much Love,
Joe
Yes I totally agree with this. The news is horrible and very scary for adults and kids. You asked what I do well I have a nine-year-old daughter and a 13-year-old son so with my kids and when I hear these kind of new yes I totally agree with this. The news is horrible and very scary for adults and kids. You asked what I do well I have a nine-year-old daughter and a 13-year-old son so with my kids when I hear what’s going on in the world I try to tell my kids about it in a way they would understand it so that it somewhat make them aware and scared of what is out there but sometimes I just don’t go into great detail on the exact subject just enough for them to be aware. Obviously my 13-year-old is a little different from my nine-year-old. I used to watch scary movies all the time and I can’t even watch those anymore because the reality is a lot of that stuff is happening in the world and I’m not even sure how I can cope with it. It’s very scary world out there. I don’t think there’s a right or wrong way to deal with the news I think it just depends on The kid and the mom to approach it in the way it needs to be approach. So I would never judge a parent for letting their kids watch the news or not watching the news is long as they are aware of what’s going on in the world. So if I keep repeating mysel The kid and the mom to approach it in the way it needs to be approach. So I would never judge a parent for letting the kids watch the news or not watching the news is long as they are aware of what’s going on in the world.
I just think an open dialogue with your kids is best. They are going to hear about it one way or another so best to let the conversation start at home and let them have the assurance that they can talk to you.
I am a mother to 3 awesome kids, 2 boys 18 & 16 and a girl 7. My husband and I don’t let our young ones watch the news and are very particular about what they watch on tv before the age of about 9. We want them to stay as innocent as possible so they can enjoy this life without fear and animosity.
I would definitely watch news if it was all positive and nothing negative or depressing. Life is hard enough that we all could use a little more of love, laughter and inspirational stories or people. I hardly ever watch news for this exact reason. It just makes me so mad and frustrated by all these horrible things people are doing out there. I mean who needs all that negativity in their life right?
I’ve had a hard enough life with being a single mother and a son who has Cystic Fibrosis on top of that, so if watching something that can make me laugh then you bet I’m watching it. Thank you Jenny for doing just that with your “Donnie Loves Jenny” show. It brings me laughter and gives single mothers like myself a little glimpse into what happy ever after can look like once you find that Prince Charming.
Most of the time, I turn on something that is family oriented, so he isn’t exposed to too much. He does have Asperger’s, but he does like to know what is going on in the world as well, so he will watch the news with me every once in a while. And when he does get bored with what I am watching, he will turn on his computer and plug in the headphones. So we have a nice balance to it.
I explain to my son that some news stations a lot of times do not relay the correct information in order to get the story out first and the highest number of viewers. Basically, as in life take all things you hear, see, or do with a grain of salt and to do your own research and to keep your faith at the forefront. We live in a world where bad things happen all the time and we need to not dewell on them but move forward to make our lives and others better.
Jenny,
Thank you for raising such an important topic. This is something that every family really should be thinking about. We started not watching the news with our sons when they were young when the tragedy of 9-11 took place. Our youngest son has autism and since we travel quite a bit by plane, we didn’t want him to see those images and not understand them at that time. How do you explain terrorism and these extreme horrific acts and loss of life to a child, especially one who has autism?
We learned however, on a flight to DC three months later, that he must have seen an image(s) somewhere that caused him trauma. He had the usual angst about flying that day, however when the plane pulled back from the gate he tried to stand up and shouted “The plane is going to crash into a building!” We had no idea until that moment and any flight to DC during that time required passengers to remain seated at all times. An air marshal came from the back of the plane and we literally had to physically keep our son in the seat. It was terrible when we never realized this was something he had been thinking about. It taught us too that we needed to find a way to discuss these things to prevent such incidents in the future.
Our lesson was to not keep things of such large magnitude from our sons, but to work through these situations and limit access to what is sensationalized on mainstream news programs. It’s not easy and we also made sure that our children knew they were as safe as possible. Growing up with parents too that were police officers also wasn’t easy because those too were stories they would see on television and worry about us coming home after a shift. Do I think a more positive approach to daily news would assist, yes I do because at least parents would have something they then could work from.
In the end though we feel we met a good balance and we agree that humor does assist. Discussing these things also helped to give them the skills to problem solve and critically think. For our son with autism it also taught him to be empathetic to others. We feel blessed in that sense because now as an adult he often is the one with some cool coping suggestions.
Again, this was a great topic and something parents should think about.
Much appreciation Jenny!
Jenny, the news and world events bother both my man and me, and our kids that we made the decision at New Years last year to go without television for 1 year and now that we are more than half way though, I have to say that I am glad we did. Don’t get me wrong I miss my shows 😉 and my Donnie fix, we do get the news paper so that we get the local news and I have the CBC radio on in my room. But I find a huge difference in my 14 year old daughter she is much less stessed all the time and more relaxed.
We are not trying to hide anything from the kids but it is less stressful in the house
I have two grown son’s that are on their own and my youngest biological child who is 17. I gained custody of a 4 children out of a sibling group of 6 from doing foster care. ( the littles as I call them all have trauma, PTSD and FASD) I let my older children watch scary movies with me and the news when they were young. I learned that it was not a very good choice! I do not let the younger children watch certain news programs or scary movies/programs. In fact, our TV is on less than 2 hours a day. I rarely watch the news myself anymore. I found that I do not miss it one bit! My kids do hear things else where and we will look something up and discuss the good and bad to the problem. I just try to make the best of everyday and look for all the wonderful things that are happening in our world.
my daughter is 4 and we try and keep the news off when she is in the room. However, myself I dont like watching the news that much anymore because all it is is bad! But as my daughter gets older I am sure I will have to sit and talk with her more and let her know how things are
My husband and I do our best to be realistic with our children. If we are discussing a news item that is traumatic, and our children overhear and ask us about it, we try not to sugar coat what happened. We also use it as an opportunity to discuss stranger danger, good vs. bad touching, etc. It seems like violence in the world has increased exponentially (or maybe because of more media outlets, we just hear more of it), and I don’t feel it does my kids any good to keep them in the dark about the realities of this world they are growing up in. Education is empowerment! We also emphasize non-violence, and helping others in need, and try to highlight some of the good things that happen in the world as well as a way to encourage our children to make positive choices.
I am very glad my 11 soon to be 12 year old does not show much interest in the news. With the live on air killing of the news anchor and camera man this week made this momma great flu I did not have to explain that. My 11 going on 12 year old is on the Autism Spectrum. He is less interested in real life stuff like the news and more interested in cartoons. I do discuss real life events with him. For example he is aware that we will be electing a new President and many people are running. I also try to explain to him local news. For now that seems sufficient. If there was only a happy news broadcast I think I would get bored very quickly. I would also wonder what alternate universe did I fall into? My life isn’t always happy so how could the news always be that way?
Why introduce the news into a child’s tender sub-consciousness. It only forms fear based beliefs and/or shows up later through their many expressions. They’ll have enough time to deal with the troubles of the world. Allow them to be in the center of their own world first.
Great question, and not one my parents really had to answer. My son is only 4 so no he isn’t allowed to watch anything that isn’t on Nick jr or Disney jr. Even those channels are limited to only an hour or two a day. However, when he is old enough 9+ years old we will watch it together and I will answer his questions when he has them. I want to protect and shelter him as much as I possibly can but that isn’t good for him either. He needs to experience these emotions while I can guide him on the appropriate way to deal with them. I was aloud to watch the local news but wasn’t aloud to watch the world news until I was much older. When I was 9 the Gulf War broke out and I was aloud to watch the world news with my stepfather who would explain to me what was going on and why. It made me more aware of what was going on with family being shipped off without much notice and not enough time to really say good bye. I will never forget how it made me feel to see the bombs dropping and watching the tanks roll in on the news. This was the only time I was aloud to watch the world news until I was about 13. These days the local news is just as bad as the world news, sometimes worse…..
I agree with you on the news being so scary. It is scary for us adults. I am soon to be 67 and when I was 13-14 or so, Russia was in the news. My cousin who was 2 years older had me convinced we were soon to go to war. I was so frightened at the time.
Jenny,
Really great topic- it’s something that I think about frequently. I don’t have any children so I can’t relate on a parental level but as an adult, the news is scary. It’s extremely upsetting how violence, hate and disrespect seem to be spreading across the world. The news is simply a reflection of our culture, so I personally think that in order to get the happy news we need to spread love and acceptance. Whether it’s as a parent instilling love and compassion in their child or an adult simply showing a person in need kindness, we need to do it more.
On different note, I’m hoping you scroll across this message and pause for moment because I have a question for you. I am currently a student at the Boston Architectural College studying Interior Architecture and am planning to pursue a career in healthcare design. For my thesis project I am designing a healthcare facility for children with autism. I believe that design has the power to help heal autistic children. You don’t need me to tell you but you an extremely powerful force in the autism community, and I am hoping that you are willing to share your expertise and knowledge with me on a personal level. I humbly ask if you’d be willing to be my topic specialist so that your stories and experiences can influence my design. Together we can create a space that promotes love, growth and healing.
Thanks for this post and your consideration- and yes, I would watch the happy news.
Hannah 🙂